Friday 24 June 2011

so many things to say ....








season's end

It all came to an end in the sunshine ... another season over.
Pale heroes in the dim floodlit pitch, where water-spirals arc before the chanting flag pass.
We watched it all,
my son and me
and bought the pies and chips and glossy Match-day Programmes,
that promised so much more.

They paraded before us,
in pale sunshine
with their wives and children
a toddler kicks the goal.

He waved as he left the pitch early
gone
applauded.

The seats lie empty now,
just the echoing footstep of my son and me
Season's End.

Tuesday 21 June 2011

fathers' day and other tales

What a lovely day!

Six o'clock this morning sees me hunkered down in the electrofried kitchen composing a small homily for the Morning Service at our local Methodist Church.  Our House Group is leading today, and we've got a baptism party in too .. so in less than seven minutes I have to cover the meaning of prayer, the joy of baptism, the Holy Trinity and Fathers' Day!

I go with six common misconceptions of prayer, and a tawdry tale of my own conversion some twenty one Fathers' Days ago, then offer up the briefest of prayers myself (principally concerning my unfortunate predilection for leaving things to the last minute).  Fluffy the guinea pig plays a pivotal role in the composition of the piece.  Hugged to my manly and still pyjamed chest he provides homely comfort and a pair of uncritical ears as I practice my lines outloud, much to the bemusement of Mollie and Dylanne, the two Hounds of electrofried.

Preparation done, and two infusions of Mr PG's finest in hand I return to the electrofried bedchamber to greet my darling wife.  A veritable cornucopia of Fathers' Day presentry is produced from beneath the bed, including a rather splendid tome on the humble VW camper van and a selection of Martin Parr postcards.

Our son calls to wish me a happy Fathers' Day.  He's learning disabled, and we conduct a delightful semaphore discussion of the "hot off the press" appointment of Alec McLeish as manager to his beloved Aston Villa.  Bless!

The morning passes in a blur.  Greeting the baptism party in the car-park, the delivery of said homily, then an unforeseen and testing interval of some twenty minutes as we await the arrival of our Minister from another Church to wet the heads of two girls in floating angel dresses.  Our House Group leader and yours truly plug the gap.  A mixture of choruses, ad libs and a journey out into the congregation to ask the important question, "What are you thankful for today?" sees us safely through.

Mrs electrofried and I return home, and what joy awaits.  Family is just so precious isn't it?  Our two daughters and our two grandsons are there to greet us.  More presents, and two lovely cards.  The first is a study in blue by our eldest grandson, freshly dried from Thursday nursery.  The second, two precious set of little handprints in red paint.  How poignant that is ...  just six months ago we might have expected but one.

I choke back the tears, and open the final present of the day.  Oh my!!!  Two guinea pig leads purchased blind from the internet, one red and one ...... cover your eyes in shame, dear Fluffy ..... pink!!

He bore it stoically as eldest grandson and I walk two boars to the lawn and a browse on early summer grass.  What a day, indeed!!

Saturday 18 June 2011

hospitalised






the book I read

On the morning of 4th June 2001, at 10.38 precisely, someone bought a Kit Kat from Kroger Retail Stores, Queen City Centre in Cincinnati, United States.  It cost them 89 cents, and they paid with a five dollar bill. 


I have no idea who bought the Kit Kat in question, but I do know they were served by a lady called Sonja.  I also know Kroger's is listed in the Washington Post at 4777 Kenard Avenue.  If, for any strange reason, you should want to telephone the store, you could do worse than try calling (513) 681-7650. 

Evidently, Kroger sells more than a few Kit Kats.  Its earnings for the fiscal year 2010 were in the order of $82.2 billion, a performance not to be sneezed at in this continuing credit-crunch maelstrom.  


So how do I know all these things?  I bought a second-hand book recently called, "Classic Crews", a lovely collection by the southern-gothic author, Harry Crews.  It includes his autobiography,  a short novel entitled, "The Gypsy's Curse" and a selection of essays.
The rather dog-eared edition came into my possession care of an on-line bookseller in Toledo, Ohio and sandwiched in the middle I found, to my great delight, the Kit Kat receipt.  It's on the desk in front of me right now. 


I pick it up for a moment, and seek to picture Sonja, the mysterious cashier.  I think she must have been part of the regular team at Kroger's.  4th June 2001 was a Monday, so it was unlikely to have been a High School girl doing some weekend work. 


And so I wonder if Sonja the cashier ever gave a thought to the purchaser of a solitary Kit Kat who tucked the receipt in the middle of a book called, "Classic Crews" that bears on the inside cover an inscription in blue ink that reads, "More for Lukie.  'The man pulling radishes that pointed the way with a radish'. My favorite.  Go sit & have a think.  Much love-o Davey (&stevie & francesca)", that found its way to the shelves of Book-Ink of Ohio in Toledo, en route to my library.


Probably not.  But it was the book I read.




best regards,


electrofried(mr)

Sunday 12 June 2011

wheek!

They sit on our knees, wheeking.  Two fast growing bundles of fur that remind me so much of a peaceful place.

Bertie and Fluffy arrived three months ago.  It all started with a birthday present for our eldest grandson, now aged proud two.  His mother had spotted them on condemned row in Pets'R'Us .. the place they move the stock that never sells.  We bought Ted and Fred, two waif and stray guinea pigs, for little more than a half crown.  Then promptly paid a small fortune to kit them out.

What a surprise when we brought them home.

I used to breed guinea pigs as a child.  Dusty arrived first, a superb specimen of agouti, firm in limb and squeak.  He helped me settle into the new home we downsized to in the wake of my father's premature death.   It was so calming for a confused and frightened ten year old to bring my little furry friend the daily dandelions plucked lovingly from a neglected garden outside.

You might imagine the salty tears that ran down a fresh-faced cheek when dear Dusty disappeared into the undergrowth one day during his regular constitutional on the lawn.  The sun went down, and the cage lay empty ....

Heinz arrived a week later to take his place.  A harlequined beauty, small and demure. And imagine my joy when dear Dusty re-appeared squeaking from the undergrowth a little more than a week later.  We draw a discrete pubescent veil across what followed, but suffice to say a troupe of guinea piglets were the outcome!

Alas, we must put down these childish things.  Age fifteen, I met a girl.  We fell in love and childish things were no more.  The guinea pigs withdrew a distance at the insistence of my new love until ....

It all comes full circle.  Despite her reservations, the arrival of Ted and Fred as temporary visitors to our humbe abode thawed the heart of dear mrs electrofried. They spent much of their first weekend with us ensconced in her tender embrace and consuming prodigious quantities of expensive delicatessent greenage.  The Japanese mizuna took quite a pounding from what I can recollect.

You can imagine my deep and heartfelt joy come Monday when mrs electrofried announced we were off to forage out some piglets of our own. And so, welcome Bertie and Fluffie.


One wife, three children and two grandchildren later the guinea pigs have returned - as always, wheeking!!

best regards,

electrofried(mr)